I love those stirring moments in a movie when all appears lost and the soon to be hero of the movie fights with everything they have to not give up. It’s those feel good moments that reach deep inside and tug at our emotions so powerfully that we continue to dole out $11 a person to watch it play out time and again.
But is “never say it’s over” always the best philosophy? How do you know?The problem is that we have all been conditioned to believe that the greatest accomplishments come from those that never quit. It feels good to believe that; but those are one in a million stories. There are far more stories of people that never gave up and never succeeded. Those stories don’t sell books. There are also countless stories of people knowing when to say when, cutting their losses and finding success by giving up.
The problem is how do you know when it’s over and time for a different tack?
In the heat of battle, you probably don’t know. That in fact is the time you are least capable of making a sound decision of when to retreat.
The key to knowing when you should cut your losses and start a new path is before you enter the battle; that’s the time when you are most lucid and capable of developing a rational plan. A rational plan always takes into account multiple exit strategies. I break mine down into three categories.
The first exit strategy is the easy one – success. If you can’t define what a successful outcome is you can’t possibly develop a plan. If you don’t know where you are going you are likely to get there.
The second set of exit points are the “hills to die on.” There are some things in life so important to you that you will stop immediately if they are violated – no thought required. They usually arise out of moral conviction or protection of family boundaries. You might say that you would never work at a company that forced you to lie to a customer.
Hill = Lie to a customer. Exit Strategy = Quit job.
If you don’t know what your hills are stop reading this now and use this time to start defining them. They are that life critical.
The third and hardest set of exit points are those that require some sort of risk analysis on your part. Every war has points of retreat with the ultimate retreat being surrender. Most generals know what those are before they start. Before you begin, look at your march to success. What things could wrong? Make an exhaustive list. Once you have a list, ask others. You’ll be surprised how many things you missed.
You now need to define a mitigation strategy for each of these. It may mean adding resources, investing more money or soliciting buy-in from others. Ultimately though, there is a point where the cost of the mitigation is greater than you are willing to accept. Know that point – that is where retreat may be the best option. Stop, step back, and find a new path.
Out of all of these failure points comes the ultimate failure point – surrender. No one ever wants to think about that as it equates to failure. In many cases that is what it is, but it is as Demothesnes once said a chance to fight another day.
The key here is that every choice to continue on also has many points of retreat and surrender as options despite how you feel about it. Clearly the goal is to succeed, but if you don’t define the other exit options up front you may be forced to deal with them emotionally as they occur. In defining the exit points ahead of time you also have a chance to develop alternative retreat strategies that may ultimately prevent surrender.
Thinking about retreat and surrender does not mean you are weak – it means you are prepared to be stronger.
Do you think about retreat and surrender options before you start a major challenge?