Instincts are a funny thing. Some of the greatest breakthroughs in history have been the result of trusting one’s instincts yet I can’t imagine any acceptable business plan that has “my gut tells me” as part of its rationale.

Why do these instinctual feelings that seem to point to the right answer need more solid reasoning before we move forward? What if we can’t find that solid reasoning – should they be abandoned?

What happens when we demand reason over instinct? (more…)

 

I have some friends that are incredibly efficient. I constantly marvel as they take on a task, use no time in breaking through the barriers, and then slay the beast without any wasted effort. I imagine that if I were a FedEx delivery man, an EMT, or a just-in-time supplier that efficiency would be a major skill I would need to master.

There is one area of life where efficiency is the enemy.
(more…)

 

Interviews suck.

They can be one of the most anxiety soaked events that leave you feeling spent and judged. Today, though, let’s take away a little of the anxiety by disclosing one critical thing you can do to get to the final stages of the process.

The ancient Greeks said it best.
(more…)

 

This week has been both fun and a real challenge for me. I hope it was for you as well. It’s been interesting reading all of the private email and phone calls I get about the topics. I often wonder why y’all are afraid to post them into comments. You have some great ideas and thoughts.

That is what leads us to the subject of the last day of the Week of Living Consciously – your ideas. All of the subjects this week as well as every week come from your ideas. All I do is assemble what others have taught me over the years and try to make them accessible. I read a lot, I listen a lot and I practice a lot but there is one catalyst that has moved me further than any other, (more…)

 

According to relationship expert John Gottman, “the best single predictor of whether a couple is going to divorce is contempt” Seriously? Not finances, sex or boredom? Nope – contempt. (more…)

 

I’m a big fan of LinkedIn if for nothing more than the same interest that draws me to watch people at Wal-Mart – it’s a sociologist’s playground. My favorite part is when people start performing “job nesting” – you know that flurry of activity that happens when one has decided to begin a job search. (more…)

 

I was talking to a friend, Jake, recently when the phone rang. When the caller id displayed the name I heard him say “I bet Steve just lost his job.” When I asked how he knew that he responded “Steve only calls me when he’s looking for a job.”

Oooh, that hurt because the reason I had asked to meet with him was to let him know that I was going to start a job search and (more…)

 

One of my favorite Dilbert strips is one where Dilbert, Wally and some old guy were having a lunch discussion.

 

Have you ever had one of those “Word of the Day” calendars or email services that gave you a new word to learn with the intent of improving your vocabulary? The idea was to expose something you weren’t aware of and then to find opportunities to put it to use.

What if we applied the same idea to our behaviors? What if everyday we were to all get together and look at one practical life application (PLA) and try to apply it through out the day? (more…)

 

Our house sits on a very heavily wooded lot surrounded by large oak, maple, and cherry trees. Sitting on our back porch, staring at this beautiful forest is where I write nearly all of the Stranded Starfish columns. It is here where I see the hand of our Creator at work.

Then when I peer around the corner of the house I come in full view of what can only be described as God wanting to express himself. Here stands a tree that was given to me by my wife and mother-in-law, a constant reminder of how much they understand me. I cannot pass by this tree without stopping to notice it and go “Wow!”

(more…)

 

If you thought that a Hidden Mickey was something they used in old spy movies from the 60′s then you probably haven’t been to the Magic Kingdom with young ones before. Better yet, if you aren’t familiar with the sport of Spotting the Hidden Mickeys you will no longer be able to walk through a Disney attraction with such beautifully ignorant bliss.

Hidden Mickey – A partial or complete impression of Mickey Mouse placed by the Imagineers and artists to blend into the designs of Disney attractions, hotels, restaurants, and other areas.

The task of Spotting Hidden Mickeys can be very addictive – there are (more…)

 

What is the first thing that comes to your mind when I say Colonel Sanders? Chicken, right? How about Hank Aaron, Job, or Debbie “Mrs.” Fields? Despite the incredible complexity and richness of each of these people each are predominantly known for one standout thing.

Unless you are an avid football fan you may not known Rudi Johnson. Rudi is a running back in the NFL that is superior to nearly all other running backs in one way – he hardly ever (more…)

 

I believe that no matter how happy you are, you have at least 10% of your psyche dedicated to bitching. For many, it can be quite a bit more, but everyone has at least 10%.

If you are a leader and want to help your teams it is critical that you know a little bit about this and how it may cause you to do exactly the wrong thing despite your best intentions.

Despite having a great day, week or life, there is always some natural tension eating at us that we need or would like to change. This dissonance (more…)

 

I am a voracious reader when it comes to non-fiction, especially books on leadership, sociology and cognitive theory. However, little of what I gain from reading a book comes from the written material. The main reason I read is because of what happens after I finish.

In 1992 I was shopping for a new car and stopped by the local Honda dealership. After telling the salesman that “sporty” was the image I was seeking he told me to check out the new Prelude. I had seen the Prelude before – just a little nicer Accord in my opinion. This year was different as the Prelude had just received a sporty new overhaul. I loved it. I had to have it. Wow, I don’t think anyone knew about this well kept (more…)

 

“Music and silence combine strongly because music is done with silence, and silence is full of music.” - Marcel Marceau

Being very new to this writing world, one in which I have very little skill but a great eagerness to learn, I am amazed at some early discoveries. My favorite is learning how many words need to be written to find the right ones. I would guess that I probably cut out 4-5 words for every word I include. This past sentence alone was originally a whole paragraph.

The main reason so much material gets cut is that it takes the place of the reader and doesn’t allow them to become part of the conversation. In other words I fill (more…)

 

I had lunch this week with a friend that works in another company. Their firm was recently acquired which left him a bit nervous about his future. He decided it was time to leave. When he gave his notice his boss told him what an incredible future he had in this new acquisition because the new company’s team was mediocre at best and that he would shine like a star without having to do anything.

Hmmm, that was supposed to be his motivation to stay – being surrounded by mediocrity.

Actually, being surrounded by mediocrity may be exactly what you are looking for in a company. Not for the reason that my friend’s boss indicated, (more…)

 

How many good things that have happened to you came because of your diligent planning? I imagine quite a few. Now think hard, how many were the result of a chance opportunity – maybe an opportunity that was pure luck?

As a leader of a Bible study that question comes up quite often. If you are a theist, is coincidence the result of God’s influence in our everyday life or does our Creator not get involved in every day to day happening? If you believe the latter or are a non-theist, is coincidence simply a state of natural synchronicity as conceived by Jung?

Wow – talk about deep, somewhat paralyzing thoughts. Regardless of which formative cause you believe, I think Louis Pasteur simplified things to a point that we can act when he said that “Chance favors only the prepared mind.”
(more…)